Skeletons in the Closet

Considering the overall timeline of my life, I have a pretty clean record. I mean, I've had my share of mishaps, a tiny black mark here and there, but nothing that if the CIA ever did a background check to recruit me into their agency, would cause them to reject my application. Or if I ever became a senator for the US government, there wouldn't really be any material for blackmail some terrorist or jealous competetor that wanted all my money and position could threaten me with. But, alas this Thanksgiving, a "skeleton" if you will, was pulled out of the deepest, darkest, inner most part of my closet, off a shelf so far back, I didn't even know it existed. Yes, I discovered today, that while one may have done their best all their life to keep their record clean and their lifestyle pure, others can cause just enough shame and embarrasment without their being aware. I sit before my computer, a humiliated authoress.

I have a male cousin my age. We're really close. This wasn't always the case. We ignored each other as children, even teenagers, but as adults, when boys stopped being gross to me, and girls to him, we became good friends.

My aunt, (his mom,) myself, and my cousin were sitting around chatting today, and I don't remember how the conversation came up, but all of the sudden my aunt's talking about Junior High, and that one time I asked my cousin to go to a dance with me.

WHAT???

I NEVER did that. And she goes on about how she wouldn't let him go because he was to young to go on a date, and he was like, yeah, that was really weird. And I'm just looking at them like,

WHAT?

My jaw is dropped, and all I can say is,

"WHAT?"

My aunt finally started to read the deep confusion on my face, and says, "You don't remember this?"

"WHAT?"

Silence.....

When I finally come to from my shock, I dramatically inform them that I never did any such thing. And my aunt replies that there was a middle man communicating for me. Or, I guess you could say, a middle woman. In Jr. High my MOM went behind my back, and tried to set me up with my COUSIN, step cousin, which doesn't really ease the pain, for a dance. WHAT????!!! Are you kidding me? There's my cousin, my good friend, sitting there, thinking for the past 10 years, that I asked him out on a date!

WHAT???

Good bye CIA, good bye US Senator!

After I explained my uninvolvement in this black mark written in invisible ink on my record, I pondered what my poor cousin must think of me, and sensed any disfunction and issues with my mom just went up 15 points.

I am undone.

Happy Thanksgiving.